...in ohio, california, or wherever...

I just got two pink Mentos in a row. If that’s not good luck and good karma, I don’t know what is. Whoa. Third pink Mento in a row. Is Mentos singular or is Mento grammatically correct? Anyway. I’m listening to one of my favorite songs on a mix I made for one of my favorite people, and the sun is rising.
This weekend is a stretch for me. It’s a practice in (FOUR PINK MENTOS!?) character. I am fully prepared to take it on, to prove that I am able to bounce back from a mistake. Despite my minor panic attack last night, I believe that I’m at my most able and willing to take this challenge on.
The boy thinks I have Corey Matthews Syndrome, where I need to be liked by everyone. I’d like to think I’m not suffering from this disease, but knowing that I have the opportunity to begin to make things better does give me a sense of redemption and enlightenment. There’s a part of me that thinks that I have a snowball’s chance in hell of actually righting my wrongs, but all I can do is try, right?
Then there’s school stuff. In on week, I will no longer be a student at Clark University. If I told myself when I applied that I would be saying that before three years from now, I’d be absolutely flabbergasted (yep, flabbergasted).
I applied early to a school I thought I adored. I invested myself in an institution that I thought I loved. But the thing is, I’m in no way bitter. I truly believe that had I started my college journey at IU (or anywhere else, for that matter), I would have been devastatingly unhappy. Those who know me well can argue that I’ve been struggling with that here anyway. I really, though, think that this all goes back to good old rule number 8. I’m nervous and scared and unsure and thrilled.
I couldn’t have asked for a better Elliot Reid to my JD this year, but the idea of being able to have lunch with a different person every day for a month if I wanted to is so nice. Seriously I cannot say enough for having “a person.” I don’t even watch Grey’s Anatomy, but I still understand the importance of one. But to be at a place where I can either re-connect with old friends or make completely new ones. I just feel…free. And with freedom comes absolutely stunning terror, but also fresh air. I’m ready to take a deep breath.
This is probably my last post from Clark, which is kind of odd considering it’s 5:41 AM and I’m sitting in terminal A of Logan International Airport (which, by the way, is completely lacking in anything remotely close to Kosher for Passover. I had Mentos and a Diet Coke. Don’t tell the big guy.) Over the course of the last 15 minutes of me writing this, the sun has come up.
The last time I truly remember sitting at watching the sunrise was on Yam L’Yam. Come to think of it, it was probably the only memorable-in-a-good-way part of Yam L’Yam. Sometimes the big things just get to me. I’m overwhelmed by being so freaking small and suddenly the huge aforementioned problems I was having seem miniscule. I feel silly for even being worried. I look around at the beer-bellied polo shirt wearer and the business man with a look of concern and the girls’-weekend-outers to my left. I wonder what they’re nervous about. The world is really big. The cycle continues.