i hate it. i've never struggled this hard to get a C in my life. ever. and its turning into this philosophical debate with myself on whether or not to give up. to nuclear or not to nuclear. that kind of thing.
my other classes? no problem. the material that im interested in flies by. well not flies, but i'm more willing to put work into things that i like, things that i'm interested in and want to understand.
maybe i should look at this as an expanding my horizons type thing. maybe it actually will help in life to know that this isotope has a half-life of 30.17 years and decays to the stable isotope 137B by beta decay.
the truth is that im too practical to actually believe that whether or not i understand the above will have a true effect on my life. practical in other areas of my life? yeah that's up for debate. but for now, i'm limiting the issues that i deal with to the cold classroom in the science building. anyway, more importantly, im too stubborn to accept that i could just drop the class. in the long run it will probably do more good than bad, and my head will certainly hurt much less.
at an art gallery down the street, hand drawn "DIY surrender kits" sat on a wall with a simple Take Me across the top. i did. the terms of my surrender, however, do not involve going to my professor with the news that i will not be returning. the terms of my surrender involve sucking it up for six more weeks and ploughing through. just go for it.
so here's to you, PHYS140, i'm waving my white flag.
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